Friday, May 22, 2009

Relationships

DISCLAIMER: this entry is not meant to make anyone feel poorly - it's just my reflection on my life.

In my daily watching of Sex and the City reruns, I find some that are instantly deleted, others that strike a note in my heart. Today's memorable quote: 

  • "Maybe the past is like an anchor holding us back. Maybe, you have to let go of who you were to become who you will be."
The hardest part of this whole experience is undoubtedly dealing with and accepting changing relationships. This is a double-sided coin... part of the changes mean I am becoming closer with the monumental people in my life, including family and non-blood-family, (who is just as much family in my book). The other side means I am drifting away from some friends. My phone doesn't ring come Friday night; I am not invited for out-of-town trips and martinis.  Part of me expected this and understands... I mean, who expects their pregnant friend wants to join for happy hour and honestly, is that really what I want to be doing with the little bit of energy I have? 

This still does not make it easy to deal with.  I still feel left out and sadly see relationships slipping from my fingertips, wondering how close relationships truly are.  As we grow older and have more opportunities to travel and meet people, I have found my proverbial "Book of Life" filling with year-book like writing on the back pages, with promises of "Best Friends Forever" and quickly scrawled phone numbers... empty promises sealed with Friendship Bracelets that quickly go out of style.  

LESSON LEARNED: Part of growing up is learning the reality of relationships.  
  • All relationships are dynamic, thus they will continue to change and often fade. 
  • Each person you meet somehow impacts your life and you somehow theirs.
  • Therefore all relationships have value. 
  • When you can find and accept that, you have truly benefitted from the relationship.
The plus side of this story is that these relationships can now be sealed with eternal bonds through Facebook... (at least while it's still the thing to do and place to be seen).  I have found many former friends  and truly enjoyed catching up; I have found a handful or former not-friends and been able to forgive and forget, realizing we are no longer the children we once were - thus finding the ending place or starting a new encounter. 

Relationships are like animals in that they must evolve to survive.

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